THE SEXIST WARRIORS
24 November 2000
Mr Grusatut and Mr Solid were sexist men. Mr Grusatut hated women while Mr Solid just saw them as sex objects. One day they were both dining in their local resturont.
'Hurry up with my stake and chips woman' shouted Mr Grusatut to the waitress. He turned to Mr Solid. 'Women are so useless these days. One time they would have your dinner on the table straight away and wipe your arse at the same time. Now a mans lucky if his wife buys him toilet paper. I blame modern times and there's too much of this feminism going on . Women have too much power when they should be crushed.'
'I like feminists' said Mr Solid.
'What?'
'Well they say they're good in bed. Once they realise that men have the real power'.
'that's all you think about. Having sex with dangerous women. I would'nt touch one with a long stick. I'd rather have it off with a man. Men understand each other. In fact I think I'll turn queer today.'
'They say that women who wear glasses really do fuck hard. You know, secerterial types. They're really hungry for it because they don't get a lot of it.'
'Give up this quest for sexual gratification with women of the oppersit sex and turn gay like me. Men do the right things. They play rugby. Drive dangerously. Burp and fart and piss on the floor.'
'I would'nt mind going to one of these feminist meetings' said Mr Solid. 'I bet you I could pick up three or four girls just like that. Once they see my good looks and charm they would give up their politics and give me head.'
'You think so eh? Well I would'nt mind going to one of their meetings to tell them that men don't need them.'
'Ok your on' said Mr Solid.
Down the street the two men walked. They past a libery that had a sighn in the window that said "Feminist group for controling mens dicks. Meeting today."
'This looks like the kind of place' said Mr Grusatut. 'Lets go in and show them.'
In they went. The room was full of women sitting on chairs listerning to another woman standing on a chair shouting "kill them, kill them".
They looked round and saw the two men standing there.
'Good God' said one woman. 'Men. What are you doing here?'
'We have come to tell you that we don't need your breasts' said Mr Grusatut.
'They are big fat ugly things. Men's bums are more pleasing to the eye and feel tight.'
'Fine' said the women. 'We don't need you dicks.'
'don't listern to my friend' said Mr Solid. 'Listern to me. My manhood is strong. I 'm confident I can service at least four of you at a time. I can do two hundred press ups. Allow me to tame you ladys.'
'We are not ladys' said one woman.
'No. you are a menace to men with your breasts and legs' said Mr Grusatut.
'Kill them.Kill them' said the woman standing on the chair. And they did, turning Mr Grusatut and Mr Solid into tins of meat.
SEXTON MING